As we share these messages on the husbands and wives, you all have to promise not to use them as a “club” to beat your spouse with. These messages are not meant to give you ammunition to harass and oppress your spouse. Please make a vow not to do this. So, sisters, the word for husbands is to the husbands, not you. Sisters have to close their eyes! And brothers, the word for the wives is to the wives, not you. You have to close your eyes.

Generally when we talk about marriage life, somehow the sisters get singled out and talked to. The message is simple: “wives submit.” But it is interesting to note that the Bible spends more time to admonish the husbands than the wives. The Bible very much focuses on the husbands' responsibility in the marriage life especially since this is a picture of God as the husband nurturing and preparing His church as the Bride of Christ. Therefore, we will begin our fellowship by concentrating on the husband's responsibility in the marriage life especially seen through the context of Ephesians 5:23-28, 31. Ephesians 5:22 does begin a section on marriage life with, “Wives, be subject to your own husbands as to the Lord.” But the rest of the chapter parallels the marriage life and particularly the husband's role to the wife with the role of Christ to His church, His Bride.

Our pattern for marriage is the Triune God Himself! So whatever the Lord charges the husband to do is actually what Christ has already done. Whatever the Bible charges us to do, we have the person of Christ inside of us who lives that way. The Lord's relationship to the church is entirely spiritual, but it becomes the model for the husband's relationship with the wife.